Relaunch: First Day At E Speakeasy

First Day... at E Speakeasy...


Yep...what can I do for you young lady?  Do you have ID?  I need to confirm that you're 18 or older in order to sit down in this establishment.  Hand me your ID.  Hmm.  Yep that's you.  Well welcome to E Speakeasy.  Why don't you just sit down and have a seat?

Now what can I get you young lady?  What's that?  You just stopped in for directions?  Okay, well the teenie booper place is down the street.  The weirdo place is down the other way.  If you came here for that stuff, you came to the wrong place.

Here at E Speakeasy, the only rules is when someone says no, or you infringe on someone else's rights - you must stop.  If you do not stop, then you have to leave for the night.  If you come back and do it again, you're gone for a month.  If you come back and do it a third time you're gone for forever.  And all my regulars here have a long memory.  So if any guy in here comes up to you in a manner that bothers you, you just let me know.  My name is Gus.  I'm the bartender...and the owner of this place...E Speakeasy.

Excuse me?  What does the E stand for?  Stick around and keep coming back...and you'll find out.  If you take a careful look around...all of my customers are dressed in spring and summer clothes...and it's presently 45 degrees out here in the middle of New York City.  Yet not one person is cold coming in here...or going out of here.

Give me your coat, I'll put behind in my closet behind the bar, next to mine.  Where do you live?  On the Upper East?  I just need to know so that our cab service will be sure to get you home.  Nope, since you're not a member yet, don't worry, your fare is on me tonight.  See, I don't want anything bad to happen to you tonight or any other night.  I want you to keep coming back.  Next time you come back...you'll bring a friend, and then she will bring a friend that next time.  And so on, and so on.

Where are you from?  Boston?  Nice.  Phark the khar, by the bhar Boston huh?  Funny I don't hear any accent in your voice.  Ohh...you're from outside Boston.   It only comes out after you had a few beers huh?  Well the stories you're about to hear tonight and the things you'll see going on in this place...well...they don't do this up in Boston.  I've been there.

Sit back hunny.  You're with Uncle Gus.  Drinks and cab are on me tonight....